Stress affects further education staff in many different ways and often has its origins outside college. Paul Wakelin was 15 when he left home. With no formal qualifications and being dyslexic (diagnosed years later), he put himself through college to train as a chef. He quickly got disillusioned and joined the army in 2004. A year later he started an eight-month tour of Iraq in a non-front line role. He got married young and started a family before then going out to Afghanistan for a front-line tour. When he was asked to volunteer for a second Afghan tour, amid talk of redundancies, he took stock, prioritised his family and left the army rather than do the tour (during which two of his friends tragically died).
“Leaving the army in 2012 was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done,” says Paul. “One moment you are part of the military ‘family’, and then in the next, when you’ve handed in your plastic ID card, you’re walked off site by other soldiers who’d only moments before been your peers. It’s ludicrous how it was done.”
Paul’s stress levels began to rise. “I’d gone from being a really proud soldier who’d turned his life around in the military, with a house, kids and a good career, to not really knowing what I was doing - I had no formal qualifications and nothing to fall back on.” Keen to find work, he ended up in a school caretaking job but he wanted more. He’d always been interested in plumbing, picking up skills while working on building sites and in the army, where he’d also taught plumbing, so he signed up at his local college to get GCSEs and plumbing qualifications.
He was soon working full-time and had moved to a new house and new area, when his marriage took a downward turn. It became so difficult that he decided to leave. “It all went wrong from there. I was close to my nan but she passed away soon after and that really threw me. I don’t deal well with family bereavements.” Then he moved to Kent to look after his grandfather who died months later. Paul was devastated. He packed in his plumbing job and forced himself to make a fresh start by taking a post teaching plumbing in a prison “I wasn’t confident I could do this but they still took me on - I’d always wanted to teach and it set me on that path.”
But so many life changes had been taking their toll. Paul once said he did not want to be around anymore to a prison colleague, whose support led to Paul being diagnosed with adjustment disorder - an inability to cope with a major life change. Paul “went dark”, cutting himself off from his family. He moved to Yarmouth, set up a plumbing business, and found a new partner before taking on his current job as a plumbing lecturer at East Coast College two years ago.
Everything seemed good again. Then came lockdown that was “probably the worst thing that could have happened”. Being cooped up in a newish relationship with both partners at home plus the new partner’s young son was too much and Paul’s partner called time. “Something snapped,” says Paul. “That was my critical point. I didn’t know what to do with myself. I was happy and then it was all gone.” He went out into the garden and put a rope round his neck.
Yet somehow he pulled himself back from the brink. “When, a bit hesitantly, I told my line manager what had happened, he said immediately: ‘Do you need help? Take time off work when you need it to deal with all this. We have support networks in place - what can we do for you?’ ’’
Paul cannot praise his colleagues enough: “I couldn’t ask for better people to work with. My department all know about my background; we were sitting down one day and I came out with it. There were lots of shocked faces as I’m good at hiding my emotions - it’s a military thing. Some colleagues have since taken me under their wing and sent me messages at half-term and Christmas to check I’m ok if they’ve not heard from me.
“The college also has a fantastic human resources lady who’s sat down with me for regular meetings. And my college principal, Stuart Rimmer, has been great; he asked me to an initial meeting with, I thought, lots of others but it was just us. He didn’t know my background so I told him my story and he talked about his own background. I thought if he can do this and get to where he is, so can I, whatever the next day throws at me.
“I’ve got through it, found my current flat and moved in and now I’m comfortable where I am. The job is great as is the certificate of education and assessor training the college is putting me through, which is second to none. I can’t fault it.”
East Coast College and its holistic mental health strategy has played a substantial role in helping Paul reset his life and career. So what sort of key support for any stress-related problems should today’s job applicants check is in place in a college prior to or during an interview? Paul says he would be looking for a person in college that each staffer could go to confidentially with any mental health/stress-related issue (East Coast College has a 'swim buddy’ system - a US Navy Seal idea - which pairs up newcomers with other colleagues).
Paul says he would also want to have ‘any time’ access to a support network without fear of any judgement and access to an external company if and when needed. He himself came across Op Spartan, an online external support group run by an ex-soldier - a sort of ‘family’ where everything is shared in confidence. One person invited Paul to ring him any time of the day or night if he needed help. He also advised him to start going for a daily run, no matter what was in his diary. “It’s been my massive saviour,” says Paul, who has since notched up several half marathons and topped that with a triathlon.)
Finally, Paul advises anyone currently suffering from stress (internal or external) not to bottle it up. “If you have a problem, never shy away from it, open your mouth,” he says. “Tell the world because you never know what those words are going to do for someone else.”
AoCJobs, part of the Association of Colleges, connects teachers and support staff with schools and colleges for online job opportunities.